I am sorry for not updating this blog for a while. There has been a lot going on, and I have many drafts to revise and finalize. I anticipate having a lot more content and updates in the coming weeks and months, though.
Today, I came across an article that caused a visceral reaction, and I walked out of our family room to immediately write my responses. My most immediate thoughts are, what are we doing to our kids? Two days ago, The Atlantic published an article called “The Mad, Mad World of Niche Sports Among Ivy League–Obsessed Parents” by Ruth S. Barrett. It’s a long article and very well researched. The photography is excellent too. Pelle Cass used time-lapse to capture up to 1,000 photographs of a single event onto one digital file creating a feeling of madness and mania. There is a lot to unpack, and I recommend everyone with children in sports to read it.
It is no secret that youth and high school sports are increasingly competitive. I’m sure most parents enroll their kids in sports initially for fun and growth reasons, but often soon, it becomes a means to an end. College is both competitive and expensive. Sports, of course, can help with both of these. If a coach wants an athlete, they may not need the same GPA or SAT as a non-athlete.
Additionally, as an athlete, they may be able to obtain a scholarship. Of course, most parents do not fully understand their child’s chance of being 1. a college athlete 2. a scholarship athlete 3. a full scholarship athlete. In reality, from 2017 stats, only 2% of high school athletes will obtain a college scholarship, and that is unlikely to be a full scholarship (1% of high school athletes will receive a full scholarship). See this link for more info on college scholarships.
On the flip side, youth sports are also increasing in expense. Parents are paying for expensive travel teams instead of enrolling children in community organizations. Private coaches, as well as strength and conditioning coaches, are also becoming increasingly popular. Parents may pay more for these youth sports than they even receive in scholarship. For some, this may be for a lack of understanding of the reality of sports scholarships. There are also likely other reasons parents invest so heavily in youth sports. In this article, the people profiled do not need scholarships. They have private sporting facilities and personal coaches. Their reason for these sports is likely a waypoint to get into prestigious schools that are increasingly competitive. We saw recently in the college admissions scandal that parents are willing to pay a lot of money to get their children into certain schools. I think in the end, most parents hope this will be a route to success and happiness. For some, it may inadvertently lead to the opposite, and I think this article highlighted this trend in this discussion of the more elite sports of rowing, squash, water polo, and fencing.
The author interviews parents whose children compete in niche sports, which they define as squash, water polo, lacrosse, rowing, etc. These parents are from an area of Connecticut that funnels their children into Ivy League sports. Ivy Leagues offer more sports than “powerhouse” schools and public colleges. Recruited athletes benefit from lower academic standards when applying to the Ivy Leagues. In contrast to the more mainstream sports, these sports tend to recruit from private schools in wealthy areas. Thus, parents of affluent children view these sports as a gateway to their desired schools. But as more and more parents do the same, the gateway narrows.
The first family profiled includes a mom and multiple children. She seems to be the most down to earth mom profiled. It starts with the parents across the country, and neither in their home state of Connecticut. Mom is in California with the oldest at a squash tournament and dad in Ohio at a fencing tournament. Can you even imagine this scenario a few decades ago? Probably not. To top it off her middle daughter, a 12 year old, was stabbed with a saber at the fencing tournament in the jugular. This injury was very close to being life-threatening if it hit her carotid artery. It prompted her to consider— “What are we doing? ” …. It’s the Fourth of July. You’re in Ohio; I’m in California. What are we doing to our family? We’re torturing our kids ridiculously. They’re not succeeding. We’re using all our resources and emotional bandwidth for a fool’s folly.” Yet even after this, Sloan found it hard to give up on the race for her children’s opportunities.
COVID halted all these practices and competitions. It would be hard to be a high school junior or senior this year. Lack of exposure will likely affect these classes. These kids will be left wondering what could have happened if they had their junior or senior seasons. I feel bad for these families.
Additionally, with COVID, we have seen several schools already cut some of these sports, which already were limited in schools offering them. While only a few have done so thus far, as COVID continues to loom and alter life as we know it, will more of these niche sports programs be eliminated, forcing these kids to fight over smaller and smaller numbers of spots? While more youth participate in these sports, there has not been a significant increase in college positions. Additionally, as I noted before, many parents who have their children participate in these sports likely did so to get them into prestigious schools. Thus, some parents expressed discontent when considering their child playing for a lower-tier school: “Sorry, but there’s no way in hell,” said the water-polo mom from Stamford. “What parent wants to have a child who’s going to be playing for a bottom-tier school with bottom-tier academics in the armpit of the United States? I want to be polite. But there’s no way in hell.”
Other parts of the article made me feel bad for the parents and kids. Coaches continuing to encourage parents to invest more and their kids and raising their hopes for schools such as Notre Dame (Go Irish), only for these dreams to never come to fruition. “She and her husband feel hoodwinked by the directors of her son’s club-lacrosse program, which happily stoked her fantasies while stockpiling her money: $10,000 a year for 11 years. “They were talking Notre Dame for him,” she said. “Our eyes were glistening … We went to 16 showcases last year. I can’t believe the money we spent to see our son rejected 16 times.”
Some coaches have reservations about these kids because their parents have already invested so heavily in their sports career. If they have already been so intensively coached, what further potential growth do they have?
Additionally, the high volume, high-intensity sporting schedule has extensive health risks: both physical and mental. Over-use and acute injuries occur in these groups. Sometimes children are not given proper healing times, and even after repeat injuries, there is no discussion of discontinuing the sport. Some coaches also note that these kids have had their parents, nannies, and coaches so micromanage their lives that they are burnt out by college or lack the grit, problem- solving, and coping mechanisms that other children their age would have developed. In addition to burning- out, these situations also increase the risk of depression, anxiety, and sleep disturbances. Instead of being a stress-reducer, sports have become the source of stress and anxiety.
In the end, when sports get so cut-throat and competitive, the kids cease to enjoy it anymore. We need to take a step back and wonder whether the current youth sports climate is working for us and what we want our children. With so many sports altered during COVID, I think this is probably the best time to consider whether there are alternatives. In this setting, I fear that those who can pay for private lessons will continue to do so and youth organizations for those with fewer means will suffer budget cuts, further restricting access to sports.
Further Reading:
https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2019/10/harvard-university-and-scandal-sports-recruitment/599248/
https://www.espn.com/espn/story/_/id/27356477/kids-playing-enough-sports-culprit-cost